Mindset story: A Zen master's lesson about what success is

Once upon a time, in a quiet village, there lived a father who was deeply worried about his son. The boy, at sixteen years old, was kind and intelligent, but he was not what his father considered manly. He was gentle, avoided conflict, and did not seem to have the strength or toughness his father believed was necessary to succeed in life. The father feared that his son would grow up weak, unable to face challenges, and would never achieve anything meaningful. Desperate to change this, he decided to seek the wisdom of a Zen master known for his teachings on strength and discipline. When he arrived at the temple, the father bowed respectfully and explained his concerns. He spoke of his son’s softness, his lack of aggression, and his fear that the boy would never know the true meaning of success. The Zen master listened patiently and then said, “I can help your son, but you must trust me. Leave him in my care for three months. You must not visit him, nor interfere in his training. When the time comes, I will show you what he has learned. I assure you, you will be satisfied.”

The father hesitated but ultimately agreed, placing his faith in the master’s teachings. With a heavy heart, he left his son behind and returned home, eager for the day when he would see his son transformed into the strong, successful man he hoped for.
For three months, the young boy trained under the master’s guidance. But his training was not what one might expect. Instead of learning how to fight with strength and force, the master focused on something else entirely. He made the boy carry heavy buckets of water up a steep hill every morning, only to watch as his trembling arms gave out, spilling the water on the ground. Yet, each day, the boy was instructed to pick up the buckets and try again. He was made to meditate for hours, forced to sit still despite the discomfort, learning how to control his mind rather than letting his frustration control him. He was given a single bamboo staff and told to face skilled opponents in sparring matches. He was knocked down again and again, but each time, the master simply nodded, and the boy picked himself back up. At night, exhausted and bruised, he lay awake, wondering why he was failing so often. But somehow, with each new morning, he found himself rising to face the same challenges. He did not quit.

By the end of three months, he did not realize it, but something within him had changed. At last, the father returned, eager to see the results of the training. The Zen master greeted him warmly and led him to a clearing where a match had been arranged between his son and a karate instructor who was a skilled and experienced fighter. The father watched nervously as the match began. The instructor was fast and powerful, striking with precision and confidence. The moment he attacked, the young boy fell to the ground. The father’s heart sank. So this was the result of three months of training? But before he could speak, he saw his son do something remarkable. The boy got up. The instructor struck again. Again, the boy fell. And again, he stood. It happened again. And again. And again. Each time he was knocked down, he did not complain. He did not hesitate. He simply got up. The father clenched his fists as he watched his son fall twenty times. Each time, the boy rose to his feet, bruised, shaky, but unwavering. When the match finally ended, the boy had lost. The father, deeply disappointed, turned to the Zen master. “What kind of result is this? Three months of training, and my son is still weak! He falls to the floor as soon as he is attacked. How is this supposed to make me proud?” The master looked at him calmly and smiled.

“I am sorry that you only see the superficial forms of failure and success. You watched your son fall, but did you not see how many times he stood back up?” The father blinked, taken aback. “This is what true strength is,” the master continued. “Many men are strong in body but weak in spirit. They fear failure, so they do not try. They fear pain, so they do not challenge themselves. But your son has the courage to rise every time he falls. That is more strength than any fighter who has never been tested. This is what a real man must possess.” The father looked at his son, who was standing tall despite his bruises. For the first time, he truly saw him. And in that moment, he understood. Tears welled in his eyes as he bowed deeply to the master. He then turned to his son, not with disappointment, but with pride.