Covert Persuasion: Psychological Tactics and Tricks to Win the Game by Kevin Hogan and James Speakman

Maybe you are asking yourself this very moment “Why would I even want to learn or read about Covert Persuasion psychological tactics and tricks?” My question to you is why not? Tactics and tricks described in this book are used on us every day. And who is using them? Well, people who know about them, people who sell to you their products, their services and their ideas. Has anyone ever sold you something that you actually didn’t want to buy, but you bought it because the person selling to you was nice, he listened to you, and you had the same beliefs and views on matters important to you. And after you bought the item or service you actually did not know what to use it for and you ended wasting your money for something you didn’t want or/and need. I believe that each and everyone of us did something like that at one point in our life, just because the person we were talking to or the ad we saw made us feel something… made us want something more. If not the actual item or service, it made us want the feeling of having it. Yes, your emotions and feelings can be your Achilles heel, and a lot of people know that. They use covert persuasion to exploit your feelings and emotions to make you do what they want you to, not what you wanted to do all along. And if nothing else, in my opinion that is a good enough reason for every person to learn more about this subject. Just because you are not in sales or you don’t intend to persuade anyone to do something for you doesn’t mean you should not learn more about persuasion. I think you should educate yourself about persuasion because of yourself, so that you can not be taken advantage of so easily as people are who do not know these tactics.

So let’s get to the book. In the book you will find some examples on how to use tactics that you read about, how to build rapport, how to prepare yourself when trying to persuade someone – questions you need to ask yourself about the outcome you want and how to get it. You will also read about our weaknesses as humans, about the mindset you must have, how to deal with people, and which tactics and tricks work on us and why. And armed with this knowledge next time someone will try to persuade you maybe you will be aware of it and you will be able to resist it.

Here are my notes from the book:

• To be able to persuade someone you must understand what motivates and drives the other person. Knowing that you can position your thoughts and requests in such a way that they are easily accepted.
• Persuasion is about creating change in the mind of your customer without them being aware of it.
• The right words in a question form can direct thinking.
• Always discover current beliefs and attitudes so you can affirm them in some way.
• People remember peak experiences, especially the really bad ones.
• The brain makes stuff up out of thin air to fill in the blank spots.
• When people experience anticipated regret, they tend to take action to prevent the regret.
• If people can visualize themselves doing something, they are more likely to change their mind and move in the direction of the imagined experience in real life.
• Telling someone not to think of something makes it more likely that the person will inded think of it.
• When persuading you want to begin to develop a sense of empathy and sincere curiosity about others.
• Discover what your target’s interests are, and if you’re not in tune with their interests, learn about them. When people talk about their interests they lower their mental defense.
• A study found that nodding your head is, in effect, telling yourself that you have confidence in your own thoughts, whether those thoughts are positive or negative. Shaking your head does the opposite. The study on nodding.
• To win another person to your way of thinking, it is very helpful to admit a weakness in your case before the other person does. Admitting fault or damaging admission you can be viewed as far more credible.
• Find and point out the common enemy.
• People instinctively put themselves into the story you are telling. They place themselves in the situation and identify with the person in the story.
• Always be looking for things to like or admire about other people. And always give more than you promised.
• Each of us has a hard-wired, biological need to belong and be a part of the group we identify with.
• The act of writing is a form of commitment. Get your customer to write down what they will do.
• When persuading your goal is to allow the other person to assign their own personal meaning to the words you’re using.
• Fever choices means you’ll hear yes more. To much information causes confusion, and when people are confused they do nothing.
• When people make a decision in a lot of cases they feel regret after time and they change their mind. To prevent this you have to prepare them for the potencial feeling by telling them about it.
• By asking a person a series of questions you are structuring his thought direction. Lead a person to your conclusion.
• Realize that you have a choice about how you react and what word labels you put on a given situation.
• Without constant attention to your own thought processes, your brain will begin to go off track.
• Success is the result of your single-minded focus on what you want.
• Realize that you are responsible for every decision you make, that only you can choose how you feel, what you do, and what the outcome really means to you.
• You can’t tell your listeners how wonderful you are, but the people in your story can.
• The entire trick in persuasion is to help the other person develop his own idea, which of course, is really your idea.
• People make decision emotionally first, then justify it with fact.
• The strength, power and control of emotion is largely a subconscious process that completely bypasses the critical thinking of the vast majority of people.
• People only seek evidence that supports their existing beliefs. So, starting from what you know they believe, give them something they “know” is true and then expand that toward your ultimate goal.
• People are irrationally and emotionally influenced by certainty.
• In business when confronted by a customer about a bad experience before offering what you think is the solution to the problem, ask the customer what they think would make the situation better.
• The success you have in communicating with others will depend on how well you can see the world from their point of view.
• People do more to avoid pain than they will do to gain pleasure. Show your clients how your product prevents pain and even enables pleasure.
• People don’t listen, they wait to talk. Listen to them, you can’t learn anything by talking.
• Peer pressure doesn’t end in high school. use the law of association and the law of friends to help you persuade others to your cause.
• Become truly intensely curious about people and how the world works.

Covert Persuasion techniques – some examples:

“Tell me, if you saved up $1000 this month because of what I am suggesting, what would you do with that extra $1000?” – This causes your client to agree that the savings would be nice to have, and it puts their focus on the future and gets them to mentally spend the savings on something they want, thus creating commitment to buy from you.

“I understand how you feel, about that, many of my customers once felt the very same way, but when they looked closer, they found…” – this gives your customer the excuse to change his/her opinion without morale dileme of going back on his previous statements.

The future pace technique – Mentally walk the person into the future, a future without the benefits you can provide. Help them experience the pain associated with not choosing to do the right thing. Mention how they will be in a worse position, and how other people they respect will view them. How they will face disapproval or possibly cause others they care about to feel some embarrassment, discomfort, or harm. Then remind them that none of  that has happened yet, and that you can help them to prevent any of it from ever happening if they choose differently right now.

As you can see there is a lot of things to know about the art of persuasion, and most of the time persuasion is covert. Much of our decision making happens on a subconscious level based on feelings we might not even be aware of. Managing and understanding those subconscious feelings is the key to the art of persuasion. To say that this book covers all about persuasion is false, but it is a great start. I found the book interesting and I recommend it to people who are just starting to get into the art of persuasion. But if you are already well versed in the art of persuasion you may not find it as much of interest to you. Whatever your opinion is I would like to read it. Help others decide if this book is worth their time.

Feel free to comment about the book. I would also appreciate your input about the post and the blog. If you have any suggestions what you found good, what you would like to see different, or simply any advice on what would you like to read as a review of a book let me know.

Thank you for your time. I hope you have found this post helpful. Talk to you in the comment section.