What is trust? Is it tangible, can you put a price on trust? Mr. Stephen M. R. Covey says trust has a big impact on cost, on price and the speed of how fast you can get things done. And I agree. You trust your friend, co-workers and family members (the ones you do), because you know them, they have proven they are responsible, they get things done if you ask them to, and they are accountable for their actions even if they make mistakes. On the other hand you have “friends”, co-workers, and family members you don’t trust, because of their actions in the past, because you saw them being dishonest, they weren’t accountable for their actions and most probably they weren’t nice to other people. So we could say that trust is build or destroyed by a persons character and competence (more about that later).
Now think about who do you trust? And how did they earn your trust… how did you earn theirs? Trust is important in personal life and in business, so I was interested what was written about earning trust and keeping it. One of the most important lessons from the book is if you want to earn trust you must first give trust and of course you must have credibility. Trust affects business costs and speed of doing business – decision making. Trust can also be used as a motivator to enhance performance of people. We have it in ourselves that if we get an opportunity to prove ourselves to our bosses, or people we really respect (mostly people we respect) we will go the “extra mile” to earn the trust that was given to us. The author says that with trust you can either pay “Trust Taxes” or earn “Trust dividends”, it all depends on the level of trust in your organizations or you as a person have earned. Trust taxes are what you pay for having lack of trust and trust dividends is how much more you earn, or how much faster you can make a deal because of your earned trust. In the book the author describes trust as a function of two things, Character and Competence. Character includes your integrity, motive and intent with people. While competence includes your capabilities, skills, results and your track record. Both character and competence determines in other people’s minds how much credibility you have. Imagine credibility as a tree. By imagining credibility as a living, growing thing you can see that it can be nurtured.
Results are the fruits – the visible, tangible, measurable outcomes that are most easily seen and evaluated
Capabilities are the branches, that enable us to produce
Intent is more visible than integrity and it is the trunk that emerges from beneath the surface
Integrity is essentially below the surface and it is the root system out of which everything else grows.
The 4 cores of credibility:
- Integrity – It’s having the courage to act in accordance with your values and beliefs. It’s to have courage to do the right thing – even when it’s hard.
- Intent – Trust grows when our motives are straightforward and based on mutual benefit. It is important for us to actively influence the conclusions others draw by declaring our intent. The main reason why declaring intent increases trust is that it “signals your behavior”. It lets people know what to look for so that they can recognize, understand, and acknowledge it when they see it.
- Capabilities – These are the abilities we have, that inspire confidence. They are the means we use to produce results. To remain credible in today’s world, we need to constantly improve our capabilities.
- Results – When we achieve the results we promise, we establish a positive reputation of performing. It’s much easier to get results in team efforts if people trust you… if they know you’re going to give credit, you will seek mutual benefit, and you will not place blame. Keep in mind that results are all about finishing.
When talking about trust we must also keep in mind that people observe your behavior. Most of the times it is much more important what you do then what you say. So to be successful at creating or maintaining credibility follow these 13 behavior guidelines:
- Talk straight
- Demonstrate respect
- Create transparency
- Right wrongs
- Show loyalty
- Deliver results
- Get better
- Confront reality
- Clarify expectations
- Practice accountability
- Listen First
- Keep commitments
- Extend trust
My notes from the book:
- We judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their behavior.
- If we can’t trust ourselves, we’ll have a hard time trusting others.
- Trust always affects two outcomes – speed and cost. When trust goes, down, speed will also go down and costs will go up. But when trust goes up, speed will also go up and costs will go down.
- The economy revolves around partnering and relationships. And partnering and relationships thrive or die based on trust.
- Trust is one of the most powerful forms of motivation and inspiration. People want to be trusted, they respond to trust, and they thrive on trust.
- Leadership is getting results in a way that inspires trust.
- When keeping your commitment becomes hard, you have two choices: You can change your behavior to match your commitment, or you can lower your values to match your behavior.
- You need to know what you stand for and you need to stand for it, so that others know too.
- Keep in mind that every interaction with every person is a “moment of trust”. The way you behave in that moment will either build or diminish trust.
- Tell the truth and leave the right impression. Which means communicating so clearly that you can not be misunderstood.
- Avoid the common tendency to put more energy into new relationships and assume that people in existing relationships know you care.
- In situations where there is a conflict of interest, the bet way to prevent it from turning into a concern is to simply be up-front about it and to address it in the spirit of complete disclosure.
- The reality is that everybody makes mistakes. The issue isn’t whether you will make them, it’s what you will do about them.
- Don’t let pride get in the way of doing the right thing.
- The way we talk – or don’t talk about others when they’re not there can build or destroy trust… fast with people who are there.
- If you are not willing to make mistakes, you’re not going to improve. Making mistakes is a part of life.
- See your mistakes as feedback that will help you improve.
- Don’t assume today’s knowledge and skills will be sufficient for tomorrow’s challenges.
- Unclarified expectations are one of the primary reasons for broken trust.
- It’s hard to hold someone accountable if they’re not clear on what the expectations are. Always make it clear what you expect of people.
- Accountability builds extraordinary trust in the culture when people feel secure in the knowledge that everyone will be held to certain standards.
- As long as a person is communicating with high emotion, he or she does not yet feel understood. A person will usually not ask or listen to your advice until he or she feels understood.
- Say what you are going to do, then do what you said you were going to do.
- Keep in mind that when you talk about restoring trust, you’re talking about changing someone else’s feelings about you and confidence in you.
- Listen first to your own conscience, to your own inner voice. Don’t let the opinions of others persuade you to violate the things you feel deep inside you should or should not do.
- Trust bring out the best in people and literally changes the dynamics of interactions. They want to live up to it. They want to give back.
Now I don’t know how to say it, but I do recommend this book and I don’t. Let me explain. The first two chapters were great (the part about credibility and the 13 behaviors), then the author just started repeating himself, or at least I got that feeling that I have already read about what he is saying now a couple of pages back. So if you are going to pick up this book be ready to read about the same point from at least 3 different perspectives, which can be great if you like that, or it can be annoying as you already got the point and you don’t want to read over 300 pages of a book that makes it’s point on the first 120 pages, and then it only spins words, ads anecdotal stories (which were good), and ads quotes (which I liked) from successful people and justify the page count. I guess repetition is the key to learning and remembering, but it was a little bit to much for me. Even though the author gave different chapter names and each chapter was about building trust on different levels (individual, company, society), he basically repeated that trust is the result of your behavior and capabilities. The thing I haven’t talked about so much was the “trust tax” and the “trust dividends”. But then again I would like to imagine we all know that if people do not trust each other they will not share information, they will not collaborate and there will be no synergy in the company. And if you are wondering how to earn “trust dividends”? Earn trust. How to avoid “trust tax”? Again earn trust. If you still do not know how to build trust here is a summary of the book by Covey (or his company). You will basically get all the relevant information without the stories, and quotes.
Quotes from the book:
“The moment there is suspicion about a person’s motives, everything he does becomes tainted.” – Mahatma Gandhi
“Few things can help an individual more than to place responsibility on him, and to let him know that you trust him.” – Booker T. Washington
“There are no moral shortcuts in the game of business – or life. There are, basically three kinds of people: The unsuccessful, the temporarily successful, and those who become and remain successful. The difference is character” – Jon Huntsman
“Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters can not be trusted with important matters” – Albert Einstein
“My life is my message” – Mahatma Gandhi
“It’s not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are” – Roy Disney
“Left unattended knowledge and skill, like all assets, depreciate in value – surprisingly quickly” – David Maister
“At the end of the day, people follow those who know where they’re going” – Jack Trout
“What upsets me is not that you lied to me, but that I can no longer believe you” – Friedrich Nietzsche
“To know what is right and not to do it is the worst cowardice” – Confucius
“To retain those who are present, be loyal to those who are absent” – Stephen R. Covey
“We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing, while others judge us by what we have already done” – Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
“The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn” – Alvin Toffler
“One of the reasons people stop learning is that they become less and less willing to risk failure” – John Gardner
“A good leader takes more than their fair share of the blame and gives more than their share of the credit” – Arnold Glasow
“If there is any great secret of success in life, it lies in the ability to put yourself in the other person’s place and to see things from his point of view – as well as your own” – Henry Ford
“Leadership has less to do with walking in front and leading the way than it does with listening to the needs of the people of the company and meeting them” – Charles M. Cawley
Feel free to comment about the book. I would also appreciate your input about the post and the blog. If you have any suggestions what you found good, what you would like to see different, or simply any advice on what would you like to read as a review of a book let me know.
Thank you for your time. I hope you have found this post helpful. Talk to you in the comment section.
